Monthly Archives: August 2011


“I will bless the LORD at all times;
his praise shall continually be in my mouth.
My soul makes its boast in the LORD;
let the humble hear and be glad.
O magnify the LORD with me, 
and let us exalt his name together.
I sought the LORD, and he answered me,
and delivered me from all my fears.
Look to him, and be radiant;
so your faces shall never be ashamed.
This poor soul cried, and was heard by the LORD,
and was saved from every trouble.”
~Psalm 34:1-6


I don’t even know where to begin.
First off…!!
For those of you who know how desperately I have wanted an Asian baby-No. I did not adopt him. 
 I cashed in my ‘Buy an Asian baby’ account today. 
The past years of knowing this man and the past few months of dating him have been unbelievable. 
He is the most sacrificial, kind, sincere, considerate, patient, 
gorgeous, gentle, forgiving, loving person don’t be deceived, he could kick some serious ass if need be.
He looks like Jesus minus the little slanty eyes & jet black hair.
His affections are for me.
His heart is pure & his love is a crazy biblical sort of love.
Every time I look at his face, I am reminded of how much the Lord loves me.
I do not deserve this type of love.
 Not at all.
This is not what I signed up for.
This is grace.
This is redemption.
This is my life & this is what the Lord is about. 

So stupid.


Life is stupid good. 
 Pages are being written. 
My soul is well & my God is sweet. 

The End.

I want to remember this moment. 
This feeling. The reality that things did not~
absolutely did not
turn out the way I had hoped and planned. 
They are so much more difficult and so much better.
 I entered  this home a young hopeful bride and now, nearly 5 years later, I leave this apartment a single mother not knowing where I will be living next week. 
I leave with a few loyal friends by my side painting, taking stuff to the dumpster
 and cleaning the bathrooms. 
I have realized so much in this home. 
I have, many of nights, been on the floor of the bathroom 
balling my eyes out wondering where God was.  
I have been locked in my bedroom scared to death to come out. 
 I have learned how to cook in this kitchen. I started my business here. 
I brought my baby home to this address. 
I have had my lights cut off many a months in this home and wondered how 
I would be able to pay the bill on my own. 
I found out that I failed out of school in the hallway and in the living room was 
where I learned about the affair. 
I painted all the walls and hung every picture. 
I sat on the porch and ate ice cream more than I probably should have. 
I sat in my rocking chair in the middle of the night and nursed my baby with tears in my eyes 
wondering why the Lord would bless me with such a sweet darling. 
I learned the importance of a stud finder, clorox wipes and a mortar&pestle 
I can’t believe 5 years has come and gone. 
Tears fill my eyes as I type this in my bare kitchen ~not because I am leaving this place but in thankfulness in all the Lord has allowed me to go through within these walls. 
I have gotten to know the Lord in this home. 
I have felt His presence and have heard His voice. 
I don’t know where I will be living next. 
My home is the Hilton for now. 
It is all a part of the story and I must walk out these pages. 
And with that, I flip the last page of that book. 
The End.

It’s a wonderful life.

Where do I begin…
Read this first: One year ago
Life is unreal. 
 Like, I honestly don’t believe what is happening. 
If you know anything about me, then it is either that I hate kites or that I talk about life in terms of story. 
A few years ago, I handed over the pen, that I was using to write my own story, to the LORD. 
Since that moment, life has never been the same. 
Life got really “terrible” for a few years. I put terrible in quotes because what seemed to be terrible was actually the greatest thing that ever happened to my story. 
Failing out of school and getting divorce was not fun by any means but it was exactly what my character needed to go through in order to get where I am today. 
I thanked the Lord then, knowing that the storm would pass. 
And it has.
My life looks nothing like anything I could have written. 
It is a thousand times better and a million times harder. 
It is too WONDERFUL for me. 
I am entering into a new story with new characters & new adventures. 
I am overwhelmed with JOY.
I beg you, if you trying to write your own story, to hand over the pen to the Author who wrote the world and everything in it. 
Become a character in HIS story.
Endure the hard times.
Have crazy stupid faith that HE knows what HE is doing. 
Then, get lost in an epic story.
What kind of story are you living?