Category Archives: waiting

Are you kidding me?! Pt 2

….The Lord is faithful and here is the continued story from a previous post titled: 
Walking out life trusting the Lord is not as easy/convenient/fun as it may sound.
When the Lord tells you one thing, it seems that everyone else has something different to say:
~get your resume’ together
~move to KC
~women’s shelter
~live with your outlaws
~move to TN
~go back to school
~Mclean Bible website
~move to Wisconsin
..just to name a few
This lead me to open up the Word of God and see if there wasn’t someone else who God told to do something that didn’t really make sense and see how they handled it:
vs14Make yourself an ark of cypress wood; make rooms in the ark…Make a roof for the ark.. and  put the door of the ark in its side; make it with lower, second and third decks. For my part, I am going to bring a flood of waters on the earth, to destroy from under heaven all flesh in which is the breath of life; everything that is on the earth shall die. But I will establish my covenant with you; and you shall come into the ark, you , your sons, your wife, and your sons’ wives with you.”

vs22″Noah did this; he did all that God commanded him.” 

If you are a serious theologian, then you know that a huge flood came, there were lots of animals, 2×2 on the arc, and everyone on the earth, except the arc dwellers, died. 
I decided to listen to the Lord. I waited. I trusted…
except that one time when I got on craigslist and got a heavenly smack on the hand.

The thing was that I could have stayed in the apartment but I just didn’t have the money for it minor details. I had to be out, or write a check by the 7th of January.
A check, from a random person, was handed to me on the 3rd of January.
And this continued, getting a check from random people, 


I put in my notice but found out it was a 60 day notice instead of a 30 day And of course I blogged about it It’s time….
The rent was paid for until I officially moved out on August 8th.
When the Lord says to wait & trust the only thing to do is wait & trust. 
HE is ridiculously faithful. 
Stupid faithful.
I promise.
Then HE told me to go and I went….
but that is a whole ‘nother story.
Thanks for reading.

Are you kidding me?!

The Lord is faithful.
There are so many little stories that I could tell you about how faithful HE has been in these most recent chapters of my story, and I feel that it is now time to start sharing these stories:
Last November/December was a crazy time for me. The lease for my apartment was up the first week of January and I couldn’t afford my 1,200$ a month rent as a single mom. Graciously, some dear friends of mine knew my situation and offered their home to me. We had been talking about this idea a bit since  September and they were more than ready to have Bailey and I in their home. How awesome was that!!! So, as I started to pack(late November), I called to see which weekend would be best to start moving in. The person said, “oh, I am sorry, it’s not going to work out.”…..
What do you mean it’s not going to work out…..
Did we not have a few months worth of conversation about this? 
I was beyond confused but knew the Lord was at work.
So, early December, another friend sits down with me and explains that they need au pair and that I could live with them AND they would pay me. What an amazing opportunity! I was looking to transition jobs and the location would be perfect and I would get to spend my days with Bailey. They needed someone right at the new year too! This was amazing and right on time! 
Journal entry Dec9th:
 ‘When things don’t seem like they will work out, HE makes an even better way than what we could expect’

So Christmas Eve, I get a call from them saying, “It’s not going to work out.”

At this point, I had 2 weeks to be out of my apartment. I could stay but I didn’t have the money.
I mean, is 1200$ just suppose to show up from nowhere?

Journal entry Dec 31st:
‘I have no clue what 6 months from now will look like. Who is to say that I won’t be some women’s shelter somewhere. As I was just thinking that, I heard in my head, “I am about to…”. God is about to. I just have to wait on HIM. I have to wait on the LORD. WAIT on the LORD. It is so hard…Things might get harder before they get easier but something in my spirit says its going to be worth it.’

So there I was, days before I had to be out of my unpacked apartment with no money and I feel like I am just suppose to trust the Lord. 
Just wait and trust. 
Here is the post I wrote: 2010
To be continued….



How many more weeks of this winter?

There is a bright future waiting. 
I’m gonna get it. 

Roller coaster

The last loop-de-loop of this roller coaster ride is up ahead. I can’t wait to get off.  

Square dress

My soul waits. 

God’s got it.

When our gaze is upward, we don’t notice those things that keep us in fear. 
It is just that simple. Eyes on the LORD. 
God’s got it.
God’s got it.
It is in that moment where I take my eyes off the Lord that things get confusing. 
The constant flashes of worry and doubt blind me from the sea of photographers on the shores of the runway. 
I can’t see straight.Eyes on the LORD. 
I don’t know where I am goingEyes on the LORD! 
what if I fall? Eyes on the LORD
what if I fail? Eyes on the LORD!
And just as quickly as my stubborn soul wandered off, it is quickly scooped up again. Waiting…….. Waiting.
God’s got it.
It is once again well with my soul. 

To be honest with you…

yes dear Beckham. I won’t tell them anything! don’t you worry. now go kick a ball.

Do you ever have those moments, days, weeks or even years where life just sucks? Me too, yet right now and for the past 3 days or so, life feels PERFECT. And I mean PERFECT. I can’t explain it at all. It feels as though everything has aligned in the heavens.
I was made for this moment. For this day. For this page of my story.
I feel alive like never before. I feel my heart beating and I hear my breath. It is THE coolest thing ever. I know it will not always be like this so I am just going to soak it all up while I can and write down as much of it as possible so that I will never forget this.
The sweet isn’t as sweet without the bitter.
I thought of this today as I was thanking God for my story and for the things that I can’t see and the upcoming chapters. The Lord has been speaking vERy loudly to my heart this one word:

I mean…..It’s not the clearest of words to be spoken to a person but I think I kinda get it. I am all about going. As a type A, that is what we do. Get the job done. ‘Don’t put off for tomorrow what can be done today’. That quote sounds so perfect to me but…WAIT?!
I am learning the hard way in this season how to keep my mouth SHUT!!
I may or may not like to talk. May or may not.
I am learning to shut up more and to be honest with you, it is not very easy…but neither was learning to drive a manual, box fold a shirt, scale and debride a tooth, fold a fitted sheet, cook a juicy piece of chicken that was juicy AND cooked all the way through, make it to Kansas City with a 2 year old and a layover and a carseat and luggage and a carry on and hem a skirt but I somehow figured all of that out so how hard can shutting my mouth be..??
There is something so powerful and beautiful in the restraint. I can feel it. I like it. It is new. I am learning. It flows into everything from that joke I was about to spew off or the little remark or the ‘did you know that…’ I am becoming more and more aware of it all and my soul is glad that my mouth has slowed down. maybe that is why i started blogging. i mean…i am not really TALKING. 
oh. and to give you some feedback from the previous post…the girl said that I could come to her wedding so KC here I come the week of July 3rd!!!!!